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the air is still
cumulous clouds torn
haiku of change
on insight timer
daily notes in the old snail log
scattered leaves on the
pond of consciousness
meandering past the bodhi tree
golden trout giggle
while the big fish slumbers
I am a fish swiming to the sea
dissolving in the waves
wondering if the atoms of us
ever drift to space
will our star dust escape this place?
or are we bound by Newton
to the third planet from our small sun?
Do you remember the naked desert?
time flowed to rock
Do you recall when this rock was better than that rock?
When the wine was so foul we watered the sand with Gallo red?
You left a clay figure of hopeless to melt
abandoned in the cold of winter desert
old Saab sliding up hill and down
building momentum to crest the summit to Saline valley
opening up to
sky and rock
to the soulless cold of desert night
to Death Valley in winter
Our journeys into the darkness were ways to find the light
So often we went from alone together to just alone
You on the path out... me on the path to wildness
The long high hike alone, with Tolstoy for company
The high ledge and million star sky a lifelong touchstone
I lay on the stone and fell into the cosmos
always there
in my stony heart
always there
my high granite bed
under the yawning sky
there were signs that said turn back.
a hawk screeching and flashing talons in my eyes,
stay away
stay away
stay away
I kept on
Stepping over a downed log I a wasp stabbed me.
electric shock snapped my head out the hike and into alert.
signs to turn back?
challenged to go on
I hiked
Hawk and wasp echoing
widow maker limb fell
crash bashed across the path
just a step behind
A pause, a shrug, an extra breath and I'd been dead.
Instead I hike on alone
three warnings
before
I found IT
on the stone bed in the night.
I found solitude and Tolstoy.
I hiked
one hundred miles
one hundred miles
alone
now and then the same
now and then connected
all I've carried
all these years
connected
to song and soaring grace
found in the backcountry
I carry it all
blessed
and still alive!
barrel chest wrapped with pain
sore
wrapped in a blanket of tears
for the pain
for the hurt
for the weight of
a human
floating and sinking
floating belly to the sky into space
between planets in the family orbit
touch the face of whatever god you can imagine
find
strength and peace
share it share it share it....
Old friend
lost so many years ago
at the cross road
solo or family
you are alone
I am not
yet we have the same task
live with ourselves
live with it
live
hidden memories of trail days
bubble like the burp of Yellowstone mud
reach to the light
form in the mind
remember when we were young
and so dumb
silent snow sleeps outside
blazing inner fire
touched by winter
wind disguised as summer
wind chimes
bird song
meditating
San Diego bird song
stills my wandering mind
my breath
like the surf sliding
on a gentle shore
blissful wave
breathe balance
breathe
be present
feel the crest
with all my heart
this song of sweet life
we sing together
